| 03 April 2009
Smokey's Sick and Depraved Movie Reviews-Caligula
Our next film is a bit more well-known, but almost as reviled as Salò. Which is really a shame, because Caligula has an impressive pedigree. Roberto Rossellini, famous director (and father of Isabella) wrote the original treatment, and Gore "I've done the Simpsons twice" Vidal wrote a script based on the treatment. Vidal and Rossellini's nephew, Franco, needed money for funding of their potential epic. And they decided to approach Penthouse head sleazebag Bob Guccione. Hmmm. Did ya think that one out Gore? When Guccione came aboard he decided that he wanted to bring pagan Rome to life in all of its excess. This included sex and violence. Gore agreed, and Tinto Brass, of "Salon Kitty" fame, was hired on as director. Brass was famous for his liberal use of sexual imagery in his films, so it seemed that he would mesh with Guccione very well. Unfortunately, this was not the case, and Brass was at loggerheads with Guccione right away. Guccione decided at first to film hardcore sex scenes beind the director's back, and then finally fire him during the editing process.
A mass execution makes for great entertainment:
For those of you plebs who have no clue how the story of Gaius Ceasar Augustus Germanicus unfolds, here's a bit of info: he was insane. Often referred to by his nickname Caligula, after the little army boots he wore while dressed up as a baby soldier during his father's army campaigns, Gaius (played by Malcom "Little Alex" McDowell) led an unhappy life, as the emperor Tiberius had the majority of his family killed for treason. He spent some of his life with his great-grandmother, Livia, wife of Augustus (former Octavian), arguably the greatest Roman emperor. After her death he spent time with his grandmother, and finally his uncle, the cruel Tiberius Caesar,played in the film by Peter O' Toole. Tiberius originally was a fair emperor, but a personal betrayal and overall reluctance to rule led him to self-imposed exile to the isle of Capri, with his confidant, Senator Nerva, played by Sir John Gielguld. As depicted in the film, Capri is a demented grotto full of sexual perversion and freakshow violence. Historians have depicted Tiberius as being very perverse in his later years, so this part of the film may not be historically inaccurate. O' Toole is brilliant as Tiberius. His face is covered with lesions, probably form some ancient STD. It is a shame they didn't give him more screen time.
As history depicts, Tiberius finally dies and Caligula gains power. In the film Macro, the leader of the Preatorian guard (think like the red-robed dudes that guard Palpatine in Star Wars) smothers Tiberius after he recovers from a long illness. This is also based on history, albeit a rumor. Many scholars agree that this could be negative hyperbole spread by the scholars, as they were NOT fond of our Caligula. Anyhoo, Caligula begins his reign by abolishing Tiberius' policies and giving the soldiers a raise. The public loves him. He loves his sweet sister, Julia Drusilla (Teresa Ann Savoy). Yep, a well-known theory is that Caligula was incestuous with his sisters, and was especially in love with Drusilla, his favorite sister. The film's only true moments of love and poignancy come from the relationship of Caligula and his sister. Which tells you, yeah, this is a fucked-up flick.
Caligula does meet his favorite wife, though, and he hooks up with Academy Award winner Helen Mirren as the biggest prostitute in Rome. Caligula makes his great-uncle look good as he performs all kinds of ghastly actions when he takes power. He acts like a spoiled, oversexed lunatic, and therein lies the fun. All kinds of raping and executions and betrayals ensue, surrounded by scenes and sets that are both beautiful and nerve-racking in their surreal nature. Yeah, HBO's Rome show is set during the beginnings of Augustus, the most first popular emperor (and Caligula's great-grandfather). And I know the program has the most expensive sets ever produced. Caligula , however, looks like the Rome of my imagination. And I never said this movie was cheap to make. Quite the contrary, mon faerie...Guccione ponied up to the tune of $22 Million to finance this sucker, and this was back in '76='77! We're talking Micheal Bay spending and then some. The most impressive work in the production of the film was done by noted, 4-time Oscar winning set designer Danilo Donati. One of the bones of contention between Brass and Guccione was that Brass was filming before sets were finished. There are differing accounts as to why this is, with one side accusing the other. The results is a shameful waste of some of the most brilliant set design I have seen in a long time. And that's the problem...
Caligula is a severe disappointment in that it could have been so good. Even a non-film student could tell you the editing process severely damaged this flick. If you are not up-to-date on your Julio-Claudio Roman history, then you may have a slightly tough time understanding what is going on in parts, because there is very little character development. Caligula himself remains somewhat enigmatic. McDowell, a fantastic actor, plays Caligula as a subversive, determined to piss off the senate no matter what the cost. This is only discernible because he is on the screen for 90% of the movie. So we sort of grasp his character. The rest of the cast is not so lucky. O' Toole's Tiberius,however, is classic, and he almost steals the film right from under McDowell. It is a shame he is only in the film for about 20 minutes. Mirren is underutilized, but hot as hell. Hell, she's pretty hot nowadays at 60. A grand-MILF, if you will... Character actor John Steiner is suitably creepy as Longinus, Caligula's right-hand man. An interesting note, Paolo Bonacelli, the Duke from Salo, plays Charea, the leader of Caligula's preatorian guard.
Should you see Caligula? I think so. It is a deeply flawed film, but I enjoyed it immensely. It is a shame so many egos clashed during production, because this could have been the first (and only) time explicit sex and violence tie in so well with a historical epic. But due to poor editing, this was not meant to be. The violence is effective, but numbing when taken so far out of context due to the sloppy edits. The sex in this movie is not that erotic. Sorry, Bob, but its true. There is only one or two scenes one could consider masturbation-worthy, and they are intercut with weirdness and depravity that will kill your libido (or increase it if you're into that sort sick stuff)
Still and all I really dug this shit. Its wacky sense of artistic excess sold me. I have never seen so many giant phallic statues! And a penis-shaped wedding cake with matching vagina cake (was one chocolate?)
Great stuff! And watching McDowell reprise his Clockwork Orange character to the extreme is fascinating. See it as soon as you can!
SMOKEY"S FINAL RATING: *** out of five
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