Bleachers Other Sports Fantasy Sports 101 with Denny Mazur
| 17 May 2010
Fantasy is so much better than reality. In reality, if you are reading this, you are at your 9-5, with one eye on the screen and one eye on the rear-view mirror attached to your monitor. Hoping some over-paid, paper pusher, hall monitor doesn't walk up behind you and bust you for violating your company's web surfing policy.
Or it's after 5; you just gotdone rubbing one out at your favorite pornsite, cleared your history (so your wife doesn't accidentally stumble upon the mating rituals of college coeds) and you now need to know what pitcher to pick up this week so that your friends stop making fun of you for drafting Carlos "Big RP" Zambrano in the second round.
Either way, I'm here to help and to put a different spin on Fantasy Sports all together. Winning is most important. But the knowledge and ammunition to mock your buddies mercilessly for their screw-ups is equally important. You will get both here.
Today it's baseball. In a couple months, it'll be football. In a couple months after that, it's hockey. There are other Fantasy Sports to touch on like the NBA, Golf, and NASCAR. But who really wants to talk about them. I'd be more likely to attend a Christian Scientology rally than partake in one of those leagues.
You know what my biggest beef is with Fantasy Sports?
Trading!
There is this unofficial peer pressure, a stigma, in fantasy sports about trading. It's my favorite part of the experience.
For me, the draft is just the beginning. It's a rough copy of what my championship team will look like. By the end of the season, it'll look like a completely different team.
I admit it could be the untreated A.D.D. But wheeling and dealing is fun. The problem is finding people to deal with. If you propose a deal, you take the time to look at someone's team, pick out a couple players that will help your team and find a position of need for them and help to fill it. Not an instantaneous process.
What happens next? Obviously the person accepts. WRONG!
3 things happen.
- Person declines the trade, no rebuttal.
24 hours go by and the offer is still there, 48 hours go by
and the offer starts to smell like a plate of unrefrigerated fish. 72 hours go by and you can see the flies circling the offer. The deal is dead, before it even started.
- Or they look at your offer and rebut with offering you Homer Bailey for Albert Pujols.
Have some respect people. I'm going to coin a term here called "Proper Fantasy Sports Etiquette" and I will be hitting on etiquette in the future. Today I'll be touching on the Etiquette of Trading. Here are a few guidelines to follow, so that you don't become the leaper of your league. The guy no one wants to deal with.
If you don't like a deal, decline it.
Nothing drives people crazier than not even acknowledging that you've been offered a trade. The one thing I hate to do the most is withdrawing a trade after I proposed it. People remember that, and when they have the itch to trade in the future they will not be looking at you.
Also, if someone takes the time to offer you a trade, they've extended an olive branch. Do your team a favor and send a rebuttal trade. You might get something done that will help both teams.
Lastly, don't send the Homer Bailey for Pujols trade. I've never understood it. The only rational that I could fi
gure here is that the person proposing the trade hopes that the person on the other line is having a Bret Michaels moment and accepts.
How to Help a Deal go through.
Now even though your leagues is composed of a whole bunch of loser's, whose self-esteem is so low that they couldn't handle other fantasy manginas in the league thinking they've made the wrong decision. There are a couple of thing you can do to help a deal go through.
Sell the deal.
As you send the deal, there's that little box that says comments, that's what it's for. Explain to them why it is in their best interest to accept the deal.
Email the owner about the trade.
Some people might not get automatic updates from the site when a deal is proposed, and by the time they log back into the site, one of the players in the deal is retired or dead.
Make a phone call.
If you call to make a deal, a deal will get done. This is my least used method, since on the geek-o-meter, it is off the charts. Nothing makes you feel like you've made a wrong turn in life than when you call someone with the sole purpose pulling off a Fantasy Trade.
Text them.
It's quick, efficient and the best way to deal. When you text instead of calling, your feeling of self-worth is left intact.
Now to what's actually going in Fantasy Sports. Right now it's Baseball. 6 weeks into the season, some Studs are still sleeping and some sleepers are studs. Below are a few players I've been impressed with.
Kelly Johnson The up and downs of Kelly Johnson's Career continues. At one point a nobody that quickly solidified himself as ATL's future second baseman, but struggled and Martin Prado showed up and ATL sent him packing. ARI took a chance on him and they are happy they did. Came into the season owned under half of the leagues. 11 HR's and 23 RBI's, he has been falling off the last couple of weeks. His batting average has dropped considerably, so look to trade him.
Paul Konerko The old man still has something left in the tank. Currently leading the league in HR's with 13. The guy hasn't hit over 30 HR's or 100 RBI's since 2006. Mighty impressive. I would sell him if I had the chance, this is probably his last burst of energy before he dies.
Tim Lincecum It's like last season never ended. 8 QS in 8 Starts, 5 Wins and 69K's. That's almost 9 K's a start. How does he do it. At 5-10, 172 pound, there's a reason he's called "The Freak." He's heads above every other pitcher in the majors.
Casey McGehee A year ago today this guy was in the minors, as of today he has better numbers than Albert Pujols. Last year, he took over at second when Richie Weeks went down and hit 16 HR's and 66 RBI's in a half a season. Currently he is hitting .311, 8 HR's and 33 RBI's. Only starting in 30% of the leagues when the season started he's a must-start. Especially since he qualifies at 2B and 3B.
Ty Wigginton The Ultimate Utility Guy. The Ulitimate Journeyman. He's been on 6 teams since 20024, and you could basically start him at 6 positions. He's always been a decent Stop-Gap player for that reason, but has never been a must-start until today. He's got Brian Roberts to thank for that. Ty was on the bench when the season started, but 2 weeks into the season Roberts goes down and Ty shines. (Anyone remember Seton Hall PG Ty Shine? Probably not.) 12 HR's and 24 RBI's, on pace for a mere 52 Homeruns, I'm shocked.
Next week, we will talk a whole lot of actual fantasy baseball. A lot more sleepers, who to start ,who to sit. It'll be good fun. No worries, I'll also mock the manginas in your league mercilessly.
Time for a tagline. Nope. See you soon.
Add this page to your favorite Social Bookmarking websites
