Written by Denny | 30 August 2010

I can't believe I watched the Emmy's. My viewership wasn't intentional. I was supposed to be nerding it up with a fantasy football draft, so I relinquished my rights to the TV for the evening. Long story short, draft got cancelled and I got stuck in Emmyland.

The Emmy's were bad from start to finish and everything in between. The worst part is the academy, the voters. I understand it is not the People's Choice awards, but it is not necessary to make an obscure pick on every award. It's as if they look at the list of nominees and think, "I've heard of him, him, him, him, him and who's this guy?" And "who's this guy" gets the vote every time.  

Did you know Jack Kivorkian was in attendance last night? Creepy? Absolutely. The only thing that would've been creepier is if they sat him next to Betty White.

Claire Danes won for her role in "My so-called eating disorder" and for her guest star role in "Nip/Tuck."

Jimmy Fallon must have thought he was hosting the Grammy's, because every time you turn around he was singing about something. He opened with an uninspired Bruce Springsteen parody, where he admitted he had to call in a lot of favors to pull off. The only favor he needed was for someone to pull the plug on that garbage, as I said, Jack Kivorkian was in attendance.

Jimmy Fallon was attached to his acoustic guitar throughout the show, I couldn't help but think of the M&M Pretzel commercial. I wanted that guitar to be the third leg of his tripod. 

The collaborations of songs he did in memoriam about shows that ended, was clever. I liked the verse about Lost, which was sung to "Time of our lives" went like this "The island, it was mythical, and in the end they died. I didn't understand it, but I tried."  

Speaking of Lost, it was a tragedy that it won zero awards in its final season.  It was up for an award in virtually every category and won none. Good job, they chose to reward shows like Breaking Bad instead of rewarding the most unique well written show of all time. If Lost was on AMC it would've won 20 Emmy's.

When did Al Pacino become a crazy old man? He used to scream "Attica! Attica!" now he screams "Alzheimer's! Alzheimer's!"

That skit with Betty White in the shower was pretty hot.

In the end, my favorite part of the Emmy's was when it ended.

Written by EdHopper | 14 October 2009

Last Friday, while returning from an early hours trip to a corner store for cigarettes, Jack Price, a 49-year-old resident of the College Point section of Queens was set upon by two men who brutally kicked, punched and drove his limp body into the pavement. The attack, recorded on a surveillance camera intended to deter graffiti, shows the assailants, allegedly, Daniel Aleman and Daniel Rodriguez, 26 and 21 respectively, pummeling Price, dragging him to a curb, kicking and clobbering him, throwing him back into the street and returning seconds later to finish him off with some more blows. Price's family told the New York Daily News that the 130 lbs. victim suffered a litany of wounds, including two collapsed lungs, broken ribs and a ruptured spleen. During a pause in the beating a taxi passed by, the driver perhaps thinking it best not to get involved or even mistaking the men for helping out a drunk who'd stumbled into the street.

The savagery of Price's attack is telling enough, but when one pauses to think that he was left in the street with life-threatening injuries, the callousness of the crime is magnified. If he was not found in time, Price could have died of respiratory failure or blood poisoning all because his attackers deemed his life utterly worthless.

The proverbial wheels of justice have begun to spin. Police arrested Aleman in the city while Rodriguez was brought in by authorities more than 500 miles away in Norfolk, Virginia. Of course, neither have been convicted, much less indicted yet, so it's unfair to say it was them who did it.

One thing however that appears to be the case is that Price was beaten for the sheer fact that he is a gay man. According to family members, Price indicated that prior to the beating, his attackers taunted and stalked him, shouting "faggot'.

It remains to be seen if this was a bias crime, but if Price recalls it correctly, than it most certainly was and the type of crime that begs an important question, which is why would two young straight men get so worked up to the point of murderous indifference to a man's life, simply because he like's men.

What we refer to as bias crimes tend to be carried out by groups of people concerned about an encroachment on their way of life. In 1955, a group of Mississippi hillbillies murdered Emmett Till, a young boy who'd made the grave error of whistling at a white woman. The redneck ethos of the time was that blacks were getting too uppity and would soon come to dominate white life, including white women. In 1977, white families in Boston pelted school bus windows when the city's education department carried out the transfer of white and black students to balance the race ratio in various schools. Similarly, in 1992, blacks in Los Angeles torched Korean-owned businesses and property following the acquittal of police officers involved in the beating of Rodney King. It was the feeling that the verdict was the jump-off point to settle scores against immigrant community who threatened the black way of life.

Written by Love Without Nagel | 03 June 2009

Just when I thought I couldn't make fun of Matt Millen any longer, he goes and TOTALLY REDEEMS HIMSELF!  Apparently, news from PFT came out that this douche accepted his position at ESPN with the understanding that he would also appear in the Monday Night Football booth if a job became open.  While this is funny because Millen is one of the worst executives in the history of professional sports, it also casts a really shitty light on the mega conglomerate ESPN is becoming.  The World's Worst CEO was completely under qualified for his position with the Lions, a seat he dutifully kept warm for seven seasons without any idea as to what he was doing.  The beauty in all of this is that Millen apparently is now upset that ESPN has given John Gruden a spot in the Monday Night Football booth after he shunned NFL Network's offer of work.  So while Millen can still somehow live with himself due to his constant luck of landing high paying, high profile positions that others could do better, (and would do cheaper) this fuck whines because he's not getting paid more for a second gig.  This humor comes into place that while the WWL is paying this bloated salary, they have begun their layoffs.

Written by EdHopper | 19 May 2009

A month ago on Yahoo Answers, a user posted a question that received some very harsh and vitriolic answers:

My wife is thirty now and she has put on a few pounds ever since she had 2 kids. She asks me why I never buy her anything nice anymore or why we never have sex anymore. I have told her to lose some weight because I am not physically attracted to her anymore. All she says is that I'm shallow and a jerk and that women in magazines are fake. That is just an excuse for women to be lazy and I am tired of it. Girls like Megan Fox are not real? When I look at a magazine who am I looking at if it's not her. She asks if she looks fat in a dress, obviously, you're fat so none of them make you look skinny. What can I do because I am ready to leave her?

Here's a sampling of some of the responses to is candid - if not touchy - question:

Written by Love Without Nagel | 15 May 2009

I'm actually biting this idea from Deadspin, but I'm not going to do the same thing.  I'm pretty sure that I am in a position where I can try to crush the hopes and dreams of anyone because yesterday I received my first job offer from a company that actually sells products and is not listed on the website ripoffreport.com.  The position is essentially a national sales director to help distribute their product to the masses, the drawback......it pays $12,000 a year.  No, I didn't say $12,000 less than what I used to make, that's a grand total of $12,000.  I'm not sure if that's a lot of money or not, but I'm pretty sure that my rent costs me $8,400 annually.  For your reference, in 2002 I took a job that paid poorly, it paid me $13,500 but came with a car, housing and additional stipends.  Due to my experience and additional education I have received since then, I am now worth less than I was seven years ago.